This and That

I miss my Mum. I think about calling her all the time still. Bums me out. I feel like I miss her more than I missed my Dad after he passed (maybe not more, but differently?). I think it’s because we knew my Dad had roughly 9 months to live and so, I spent everyday of those 9 months with him. Every. Day. Even if I was just there an hour. We saw his decline and kinda were more “prepared” I guess you could say. With my mom….she always struggled to breathe. Some days better than others, but all pretty similar. Then one day the call comes that she’s taken a turn. A turn? Are you sure or is she just having a really difficult day? Then…poof. She’s gone (not really, but now it seems that way). Her heart kept pumping away those last days and I’m sure she would’ve lived longer, a LOT longer had she never smoked.

Snow day and dentist Tuesday. Awesome. I hated every minute of taking all 4 boys to the dentist. Both Dallas and Killian had a cleaning. Good news is…NO CAVITIES! I have awful teeth, so, I am a naggg about brushing and flossing. Looming dentist appointments cause me anxiety. Glad it’s over.

I’ve realized something awful about myself. I have discovered that I am a huge part of the mess in my house. I hate to admit it, but I just started to realize I never put anything away! I am so overwhelmed and busy that I am always rushing into the next thing before I completely finish the first. I am constantly working on 10 different things at once. I really need to work on this. I also realized I keep a lot if stuff we don’t need. I keep clothes I used to wear to work (yeah..I worked outside the home for a minute, once) in case I ever work again….like I would wear those clothes, like they would fit, like they’d be in style? What is wrong with me? Really. I’m getting rid if things that don’t bring me joy. I have too many coats, too much stuff.

I’m not getting rid of these two though. No matter how nutty they make me.

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